Guiding Others – A Story of Two Horses

Are we guiding others?

This tale reminds us that we must care for one another, not only with their needs, but also by guiding others along the right path in life.

Two Horses

On a forgotten country road, there is a field, with two horses in it.

From a distance, each horse looks like any other horse. But if you look closer you will notice something quite interesting.

One of the horses is blind.

The horse’s owner has chosen not to have him put down. Instead he has built a safe and comfortable barn for him to live in.

This alone is pretty amazing. But if you stand nearby and listen, you will hear the sound of a bell. The sound is coming from a smaller horse in the field.

Attached to the smaller horse’s halter is a copper-colored bell. It lets the blind friend know where the smaller horse is, so he can follow.

If you take a moment to stand and watch these two friends, you’ll see that the horse with the bell is always checking on the blind horse. The blind horse listens for the bell.  He then slowly walks to where the other horse is, trusting he will not be led astray.

Each evening the horse with the bell returns to the shelter of the barn. On the way, he will occasionally stop to look back. He is making sure that the blind friend isn’t too far behind to hear the bell.

We all need people we can depend on when we face struggles in life. Sometimes we are the guide. And sometimes we need others to guide us. Listen for my bell and I’ll listen for yours.

Scriptures on Helping Others and Guiding Others

Helping Others

  • Hebrews 6:10 – “God is not unjust; he will not forget your work and the love you have shown him as you have helped his people and continue to help them.”
  • Luke 6:38 – “Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”
  • Matthew 25:44-45 – “They also will answer, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?’ ” He will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.'”
  • Isaiah 58:10-11 – “Feed the hungry, and help those in trouble. Then your light will shine out from the darkness, and the darkness around you will be as bright as noon. The LORD will guide you continually, giving you water when you are dry and restoring your strength. You will be like a well-watered garden, like an ever-flowing spring.”

Guiding Others

  • Ephesians 4:2 – “Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.”
  • 1 Thessalonians 5:11 – “Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.”
  • Galatians 6:2 – “Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way, you will fulfill the law of Christ.”
  • 1 Corinthians 12:25 – “There should be no division in the body, but that its parts should have equal concern for each other.”
  • Philippians 2:3-5 – “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus.”
  • Proverbs 12:26 – “The godly give good advice to their friends; the wicked lead them astray.” (NLT)
  • Proverbs 17:17 – “A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.” (ESV)
  • Proverbs 18:24 – “Some friends don’t help, but a true friend is closer than your own family.” (CEV)
  • Luke 6:31 – “Treat others the same way you want them to treat you.” (NASB)
  • Romans 15:1 – “We who are strong ought to bear with the failings of the weak and not to please ourselves.”
  • Isaiah 58:10-11 – “Feed the hungry, and help those in trouble. Then your light will shine out from the darkness, and the darkness around you will be as bright as noon. The LORD will guide you continually, giving you water when you are dry and restoring your strength. You will be like a well-watered garden, like an ever-flowing spring.”

Story of the Diamond Dealer – What’s your Passion?

A story illustrating the difference between knowing something and having passion about something.

Winston was a famous New York diamond dealer. He arranged a meeting with a merchant who wanted to add a unique diamond to his collection.

“I have the perfect diamond for you. Please come see me. I am sure this diamond is exactly what you are looking for.”

The collector flew to New York and Winston assigned a salesman to meet him and show him the diamond. When the salesman presented the diamond to the merchant he described the expensive stone by pointing out all its fine technical features. The merchant listened and praised the stone but turned away and said, “It’s a wonderful stone but not exactly what I wanted.”

Winston, who had been watching the presentation from a distance, stopped the merchant and asked, “Do you mind if I show you the diamond once again?” The merchant agreed and Winston presented the same stone. But, instead of talking about the technical features of the stone, Winston spoke spontaneously about his own genuine admiration of the diamond and what a rare thing of beauty it was. Abruptly, the customer changed his mind and bought the diamond.

While he was waiting for the diamond to be packaged and brought to him, the merchant turned to Winston and asked, “Why did I buy it from you when I had no difficulty saying no to your salesman?”

Winston replied, “The salesman is one of the best in the business and he knows more about diamonds than I do. I pay him a good salary for what he knows. But I would gladly pay him twice as much, if I could put into him something I have and he lacks. You see, he knows diamonds, but I love them.”

“Don’t ask yourself what the world needs; ask yourself what makes you come alive. And then go and do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”
— Howard Thurman, Author and Philosopher

Do we simply know God, or do we love God? Is God our Passion?

Scriptures on Passion for God

  • Matthew 22:37 – And he said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.”
  • 1 Corinthians 8:3 – But if anyone loves God, he is known by God.
  • Revelation 2:4 – I have this against you, that you have abandoned the love you had at first.
  • Luke 10:38-42 – Now as they went on their way, Jesus entered a village. And a woman named Martha welcomed him into her house. And she had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet and listened to his teaching. But Martha was distracted with much serving. And she went up to him and said, “Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Tell her then to help me.” But the Lord answered her, “Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things, but one thing is necessary. Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her.”
  • Mark 12:29-34 – Jesus answered, “The most important is, ‘Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these.” And the scribe said to him, “You are right, Teacher. You have truly said that he is one, and there is no other besides him. And to love him with all the heart and with all the understanding and with all the strength, and to love one’s neighbor as oneself, is much more than all whole burnt offerings and sacrifices.”

Puppies for Sale


A shop owner placed a sign above his door that said: “Puppies For Sale.”

Signs like that have a way of attracting young children. Soon a young boy appeared under the store owner’s sign.

“How much are you going to sell the puppies for?” he asked.

The shop owner replied, “Some are thirty dollars, some are more.”

The boy reached into his pocket and pulled out some change. After counting it, he said, “I have two dollars and thirty-seven cents” he said. “Can I please look at them?”

“Well, I’m afraid I can’t sell you one of these puppies for a two dollars and thirty-seven cents. You’ll have to save your money and come back next time we have more puppies for sale.”

About that time, the store owner’s wife brought out another puppy that had been hidden in the back of the store. It was smaller than the other puppies, and had a bad leg. It couldn’t stand up very well, and when it tried to walk, it limped.

Immediately the young boy pointed to the limping puppy and said, “What’s wrong with that little dog?”

The shop owner explained. The veterinarian had examined the little puppy and discovered it didn’t have a hip socket. It would always limp. It would always be lame.

“Oh I wish I had the money to buy that puppy!” exclaimed the boy with excitement. “That’s the puppy I would choose!”

The shop owner said, “Well that puppy is not for sale, son. But if you really want him I”ll give him to you. No charge.”

The young boy got upset. He looked straight into the store owner’s eyes, pointing his finger, and said; “I don’t want you to give him to me. That little dog is worth every bit as much as all the other dogs and I’ll pay full price. In fact, I’ll give you $2.37 now, and 50 cents a month until I have him paid for.”

The store owner was perplexed. “You don’t want to spend your money on this little dog, son. He is never going to be able to run and play with you like other puppies.”

To his surprise, the little boy reached down and rolled up his pant leg to reveal a badly twisted, crippled left leg. The leg was supported by a big metal brace. He looked up at the shop owner and softly replied, “I don’t run so well myself, and the little puppy will need someone who understands!”

The man was now biting his bottom lip. Tears welled up in his eyes. He smiled and said, “Son, I hope and pray that every one of these puppies will have an owner such as you.”

We ALL need someone who understands!

TAKE IT TO THE NEXT LEVEL

 

MAKE IT SPIRITUAL

  • Do you enjoy shopping? Why or why not?
  • How much money did you spend yesterday?
  • Where did you spend it?
  • What did you spend it on?
  • What is something that you have bought recently that cost a lot of money?
  • What is the most valuable thing that you own?
  • What is the most expensive thing you’ve ever bought?
  • Have you ever bought something second hand (i.e. used)? Would you pay full price for it?
  • When we are told that God bought us at a price and that price was his most valuable possession, his Son, how does that make you feel?
  • If someone trades their most valuable possession for something else, what does that tell you about the thing that they traded for? How valuable is it?

Scripture says that we were “bought with a price.” (1 Corinthians 6:20; 1 Corinthians 7:23) Jesus paid a very high price for you when he went to the cross. He did it because he loves you and wants you to be with him. And he understands what you are going through. As it says in the book of Isaiah, he was the “Suffering Servant” who “bore our iniquities.” He took all of the pain we deserve upon himself. (See also 1 Peter 2:24)

You may feel like an outcast, a nobody. You may think nobody likes you, that nobody wants you. You may be suffering, going through difficult times. Through all of that, you can be sure that Jesus understands. He knows exactly how you feel.

MAKE IT PRACTICAL

  • Do you belong to Christ?
  • What should our response be, knowing that we were bought at a high price?
  • How can we glorify God with our bodies, our actions, everything we are and do?

MAKE IT PERSONAL

  • Knowing that you are God’s most valuable possession, how does that make you feel?
  • What can you do this week to show your gratitude to God for what he has done for you?

SCRIPTURES

  • Isaiah 53:5 – “But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was on him, and by his wounds we are healed.”
  • 1 Corinthians 6:20 “you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.” (NIV)
  • 1 Corinthians 7:23 “You were bought with a price; do not become slaves of men.” (NASB)
  • 1 Peter 2:24 – “He himself bore our sins” in his body on the cross, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; “by his wounds you have been healed.” (NIV)

Born to Fly

Once, there was a blizzard high in the mountains. A nest, near the summit, broke apart in the fierce winds. A single eagle’s egg fell out and slid down the side of the mountain on the snow. Miraculously, it was not broken as it careened down rocky slopes all the way into the valley below.

It came to rest, unscathed, in the tall grass near a nest of prairie chickens. The prairie chicken mother noticed the egg. Thinking it was one of her own that had fallen out, she picked it up and put it in her nest.

In time it hatched with the prairie chicks and grew up among them. The young eaglet grew very large and very powerful. Though he certainly didn’t look like a Prairie Chicken he acted like one.

He scratched in the dirt for seeds and insects to eat. He clucked and cackled. And he flew in a brief thrashing of wings and flurry of feathers no more than a few feet off the ground. After all, that’s how prairie chickens were supposed to fly.

One day, the little eagle and his prairie chicken siblings were out chasing bugs in the grass. A huge shadow fell over the land. They all looked up and saw the majestic sight of an eagle soaring high in the cloudless sky. Hanging with graceful majesty on powerful winds, it soared with scarcely a beat of its strong golden wings.

One of his “brothers” said, “I see that look in your eyes. You could never fly like that. The eagle is the greatest of all the birds. YOU ARE A PRAIRIE CHICKEN.”

For a moment, the little eagle thought he would bolt up out of the prairie chicken world and do great aerial exploits with the eagles. Then the thought passed. “You’re right,” he said. “I’m just a prairie chicken.”

He returned to looking for seeds and grubs, pecking out a mere existence. The eagle spent his whole life looking up at eagles, longing to join them among the clouds. It never once occurred to him to lift his wings and fly. The eagle died thinking it was a prairie chicken.

You can fly like an eagle or dig around in the dirt like a prairie chicken. Don’t listen to those around you. You were created to fly. Your full potential is waiting. Life with all its excitement is ready to be seized. It is time to give up your small ambitions. It’s time to take a leap like an eagle, to stretch your wings, to rise above the mountains and soar through the clouds.

Choose to fly!

TAKE IT TO THE NEXT LEVEL

Make it Practical

  • What are some of the things we hear from others around us?
  • What are some of the labels people place on us?
  • What are some of the positive and negative messages we hear today?

Make it Spiritual

You were born to fly. But some of you think and act like prairie chickens because the world keeps telling you that’s what you are. God created you “a little lower than the angels.” Do you ever feel like there’s something more to life than what you are experiencing? Look up! Lift your wings and fly! God wants you to be all that you were created to be. The apostle Peter writes in I Peter 1:14, “As obedient children, do not conform to the evil desires you had when you lived in ignorance.” In other words, “Stop living like eagles who think they are prairie chickens.” You are no longer ignorant. You know who and what you are. You are born again through the living and enduring Word of God. Now live that way. Spread your wings and fly.

  • What are some of the things the Bible says about us?
  • What are some things God says about us?
  • How should these things influence the life that we live?

Make it Personal

  • What messages do you hear that have the greatest impact on you?
  • How can we respond to the messages of the world around us?
  • How do we respond the messages from God?
  • Name one piece of advice you think God would give you today.

Scripture Verses

 

  • 1 Corinthians 2:9 – “However, as it is written: ‘What no eye has seen, what no ear has heard, and what no human mind has conceived’— the things God has prepared for those who love him.” (NIV)
  • Isaiah 40:31 – “but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.” (NIV)
  • Ephesians 3:20 – “Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us” (NIV)
  • Mark 10:29-30 – “‘Truly I tell you,’ said Jesus, ‘no one who has left home or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or fields for My sake and for the gospel will fail to receive a hundredfold in the present age — houses and brothers and sisters and mothers and children and fields, along with persecutions — and to receive eternal life in the age to come.'” (NIV)
  • Psalm 84:11 – “For the LORD God is a sun and shield; the LORD bestows favor and honor; no good thing does he withhold from those whose walk is blameless.” (NIV)
  • Matthew 7:24-27 – “Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock. But everyone who hears these words of mine and does not put them into practice is like a foolish man who built his house on sand. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell with a great crash.” (NIV)
  • Psalm 8:3-8 – “When I consider your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place, what is mankind that you are mindful of them, human beings that you care for them? You have made them a little lower than the angels and crowned them with glory and honor. You made them rulers over the works of your hands; you put everything under their feet: all flocks and herds, and the animals of the wild,
    the birds in the sky, and the fish in the sea, all that swim the paths of the seas.” (NIV)
  • Hebrews 2:7 – “You made them a little lower than the angels; you crowned them with glory and honor.” (NIV)
  • 1 Peter 1:14 – “As obedient children, do not conform to the evil desires you had when you lived in ignorance.” (NIV)

How to Catch a Monkey

“What are we doing tomorrow?” the young hunter asked his uncle.

“Let’s catch some monkeys.” the uncle replied.
 
“Monkeys?” the young hunter asked excitedly.
 
“Yes,” the uncle said with a smile, “And if you catch one you can take him home as a pet.”
 
And so, the next morning, at the first hint of dawn they set off from their hut and into the jungle. After some time, they came to a coconut tree and the uncle sat upon the ground.
 
“It’s time to prepare the monkey trap,” he said.
 
He then picked up a freshly fallen coconut, cut a small hole in the top, and drank the refreshing coconut water. He passed the coconut to the young hunter, along with a knife. “Make the hole bigger, but not too big.”
 
He then placed a small, fragrant orange in the hollowed-out coconut and chained the coconut to a tree. The young hunter and uncle retreated to hide in the nearby bushes.
 
It wasn’t long before the chains made a loud, rattling sound. The young hunter peeked his head out of hiding. And then he saw it. A panicked monkey was desperately trying to free his hand from the coconut.
 
The uncle explained, “As long as the monkey keeps its fist wrapped around the orange, he will never escape. The monkey merely needs to let go. But he is too focused on the orange to realise the path to freedom.”
 
That which is true of monkeys is also true of people.
 
What is it that you’re holding onto that’s keeping you from freedom in your life?
 
It’s time to let go!

The Poor Family

One day the father of a wealthy family took his son on a trip to the country to show him how poor people live.

They spent a couple of days and nights on the farm of a very poor family.

After returning home, the father asked his son, “How was the trip?”

“It was great, Dad.”

“Did you see how poor people live?” the father asked.

“Oh yes”, said the son.

“So, What did you learn from the trip?” asked the father.

The son answered:

“I learned that we have one dog and they had four.”

“We have a pool that reaches to the middle of the garden and they have a creek that has no end.”

“We have imported lanterns in our garden and they have the stars at night.”

“Our patio reaches to the front yard and they have the whole horizon.”

“We have a small piece of land to live on and they have fields that stretch as far as the eye can see.”

“We buy our food, but they grow theirs.”

“We have paid servants to serve us, but they happily serve each other.”

“We have walls around our property to protect us, they have friends to protect them.”

The boy’s father was speechless.

Then his son added:
“Thanks, Dad for showing me how poor we are.”

Two Frogs

Two Frogs: a story on dealing with discouraging words

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A story on how we can deal with discouraging words

A group of frogs were hopping contentedly through the woods, chasing after flies. Suddenly, two of them slipped into a deep hole, hidden by loose grass and weeds.

The other frogs gathered around the deep hole. They sadly knew their amphibious friends were doomed.

The two frogs in the hole leaped with all their strength, but were unable to escape.

“Give up,” the other frogs consoled them. “You are as good as dead. You can’t succeed. Why waste your time trying? It’s impossible. The hole is too deep. You will never make it out!”

But still the two frogs kept trying.

The crowd yelled louder, “You wouldn’t be in this situation if you had been more careful. Save your energy. There is no hope.” In time, one of the frogs gave in to what the others were saying. Exhausted, he resolved himself to his fate, lay down at the bottom of the pit and “croaked” and died.

The other frog continued to jump as hard as he could even though his body ached with pain.

Once again, his companions began yelling, “Just give up. Stop the pain. There’s no need to struggle. Accept your fate. You’re wasting your time and effort.”

But the weary frog jumped harder and harder. Finally, with one mighty lunge, the frog leaped to the very top of the hole barely grasping its edge. He pulled himself to safety.

Amazed, the other frogs celebrated his freedom. They gathering around him and asked, “Why did you continue jumping when we told you it was impossible?”

The escaped frog looked at them and said: “Thank you! Thank you very much!”

The other frogs were puzzled and asked. “Why are you thanking us?”

The escaped frog then answered: “Pardon? What did you say? Sorry, I have a bit of a hearing problem”.

“I’m really thankful to you. While I was trapped down in the hole, I was about to give up. I couldn’t hear what you were shouting but it meant so much to me that you were cheering me on! You never gave up on me. Because of your encouragement, I was inspired to try harder and I was able to escape”.

You can accomplish amazing feats when you turn a deaf ear to the discouraging words of negative naysayers.

And think about what you say before it comes out of your mouth. It might just be the difference between life and death.

The Butterfly

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Gardener held a delicate cocoon in the palm of his hand.

“What’s that?” The young boy asked.

“Why it’s a cocoon,” replied the gardener. “Inside is a caterpillar. He’s in the dark. But when he’s ready, he’ll break out and turn into a wondrous and beautiful butterfly.”

“Can I have it?” asked the young boy.”

“Of course,” answered the gardener. “But first, you must promise that you won’t open the cocoon for the butterfly when he begins to break out.”

The young boy agreed and took the cocoon home with him.

The very next day, the cocoon began to tremble and the butterfly fought hard to escape. The entire cocoon shook and trembled with the butterfly’s efforts to emerge. The struggle went on for what seemed like an eternity to the concerned young boy. He became so distressed over the butterfly’s struggle that he decided to help and broke open the cocoon.

He continued to watch, eager to see the butterfly soar with its beautiful wings. Unfortunately, the butterfly just crawled around with withered wings and a huge body. It died, never able to fly.

The boy returned to the gardener crying and cradling the dead butterfly in his hand.

“You helped the butterfly escape from the cocoon, didn’t you?” the gardener asked.

“With tears in his eyes; the boy admitted that he had opened the cocoon.”

“What you didn’t understand,” the gardener said, “was that the butterfly had to go through the struggle. Only then could he transform from a lowly caterpillar to a magnificent butterfly. Only then would he expand his wings and be able to fly. By trying to make it easier for him, you actually made it harder for him; in this case, impossible to fly. You killed him with good intentions.”

Sometimes, a little extra effort is precisely what prepares us for the next obstacle in life. If we never experience the struggle, we will never be able to fly!

Christmas – So you think you can dance

This is probably more appropriate for children rather than youth, but I have included it on the website anyway as we have a lot of children’s workers who visit.

GAME DESCRIPTION

  • In this Christmas Party Game, participants must dance to the Christmas Holiday Music until it stops. When the Christmas Music stops, everyone must freeze in place.

GAME MATERIALS

  • A good selection of Christmas Music that is upbeat and suitable for dancing.
    Optional: A good camera to take photos of the dancers in various fun poses after the music stops.

GAME PREPARATION

  • – Set up a CD player or stereo system to play the music.

GAME PLAY

  • Everyone must dance as long as the Christmas music is playing.
  • As soon as the music stops, everyone must freeze.
  • Anyone who moves after the music stops is eliminated.
  • The last player left wins!

 

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Butterball Turkey Hotline

Over the years, the Butterball Turkey Talk-Line staff have had their share of memorable calls — inquiries that stand out from the crowd because they’re heartwarming or amusing. We asked some of the veteran staff members to tell us their favorites; plus, we rounded up a bunch of our own personal favorites from the Talk-Line archives. It’s hard to beat the call from a trucker who planned to cook his Thanksgiving turkey on the engine of his truck (“Will it cook faster if I drive faster?”), but some of these come pretty close.

WARNING: Do not attempt to adjust your screen — these are real incidents, true stories — from the front lines!

  • Home alone, a Kentucky woman was in the doghouse when she called the Butterball Turkey Talk-Line. While preparing the turkey, her Chihuahua jumped into the bird’s body cavity and couldn’t get out. She tried pulling the dog and shaking the bird, but nothing worked. She and the dog became more and more distraught. After calming the woman down, the Talk-Line home economist suggested carefully cutting the opening in the cavity of the turkey wider. It worked and Fido was freed!
  • Birdie, eagle and turkey? Roasting a turkey doesn’t have to interfere with the daily routine, so said a retired Floridian. He called “TurkeyCentral” for turkey grilling tips while waiting to tee off from the 14th hole.
  • Taking turkey preparation an extra step, a Virginian wondered, “How do you thaw a fresh turkey?” The Talk-Line staffer explained that fresh turkeys aren’t frozen and don’t need to be thawed.
  • Don’t wait until the last minute! On Thanksgiving Day, a Georgian woman took the “Be prepared” motto to heart. She had just agreed to host Thanksgiving Dinner and called the Talk-Line a year ahead of time for turkey tips.
  • Happy Thanksgiving, President Clinton! A Southern woman called to comment, “On Thanksgiving Day, the Butterball Turkey Talk-Line is more important than the President. He can take the day off, but the Talk-Line staff can’t.” (The Butterball Turkey Talk-Line is open Thanksgiving Day, 6 am to 6 pm, CST.)
  • Thanksgiving Dinner on the run. A woman called 1-800-323-4848 to find out how long it would take to roast her turkey. To answer the question, the Talk-Line home economist asked how much the bird weighed. The woman responded, “I don’t know, it’s still running around outside.”
  • Tofu turkey? No matter how you slice it, Thanksgiving just isn’t Thanksgiving without turkey. A restaurant owner in California wanted to know how to roast a turkey for a vegetarian menu.
  • White meat, anyone? A West Coast woman took turkey preparation to extremes by scrubbing her bird with bleach. Afterward, she called the Talk-Line to find out how to clean off the bleach. To her dismay, she was advised to dispose of the turkey.
  • A young girl called on behalf of her mother who needed roasting advice. To provide approximate roasting times, the home economist asked what size the turkey was. Without asking her mother the little girl paused, then replied, “Medium.”
  • A novice turkey-cooking chef wanted to know if the yellow netting and wrapper around the turkey should be removed before roasting. Envisioning a melted plastic turkey blob, the home economist responded, “Yes,” then offered complete roasting directions.
  • Then there’s the time a lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but couldn’t find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, “Do these turkeys get any bigger?” The stock boy replied, “No ma’am, they’re dead.”

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